Execution vs Conception

I love having ideas. Ideas are fun, manipulable, infinitely complex or simple. They don’t take any work to think about, expand in breadth and depth. It doesn’t take effort to plan execution. Much like calculus, the manipulation of abstract possibilities is fun and easy. Once it gets to the actual computation and execution, though, the process becomes less fun.

This is why I experiment with so many engines and SDKs, and why I draw and write much more than I model and map. It is enough to know that I have the skills to do (or figure out how to do) what I want to do. If carrying through and actual doing the boring grunt work isn’t fun, why should I do it? That said, having a final product is the most satisfying thing in the world. When an external motivator hits the project, like money or responsibility or grades, I am motivated to work through the grunt work. Then I get to stand on the other side and beam at my beautiful realization of an idea.

Carrying this through to its logical extreme, I feel like the best way to force myself to produce a final product in the real world is to throw myself headfirst into the deep waters. If I make game creation my livelihood (and preferably a few other persons’s too), a final product will emerge in due time. If I keep it as my hobby, my ideas will never get off the ground floor — at most I will get some proof of concepts, or a half-completed level.

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Strategic Idea Reserves

I’ve noticed recently that my behavior has become a bit blander. I am more content to just sit and think rather than share my ideas with others. I doodle less, and when I do it is only about a few select things. This stems, I believe, from this blog. As I write down the ideas stirring around in my brain, I share them definitively. Rather than telling snippets of an idea (or at least its current iteration) to whoever happens to be around me, I can tell the whole idea to the Internet. Thus, there is no reason to discuss it or think about it anymore.

By posting almost everyday this month, I’ve burned through my idea reserves quickly. It’s as if I went straight for the gold nuggets at first and now I’m left to sifting for flakes. Ideas don’t form as rapidly as I’m posting them (although maybe that’s because before now I’ve had enough ideas as it were), and pretty soon I’ll burn through even my strategic idea reserves. Sure, I have interesting little tidbits, but nothing to make a substantial post. Maybe I’ll make an anthology post someday.

My interests balance between three points it seems. The main two are Writing and Coding (which includes the technical side of level design). The third, Drawing (also the creative part of level design), is less influential than it used to be, but I still have an interest in it and upkeep my residual skill often enough through doodling. Right now it seems to be heading from Coding to Drawing and a little bit of Writing. We’ll see where this blog will go as my interests change.

What I wanted to talk about today was circuits and mechanisms in Minecraft, but that can wait. What’s been on my mind this weekend has been a Crysis map I’ve been working on. That’s why I haven’t posted in the past two days; I’ve been up late working on the map. Of course, there’s not much to talk about on that thread. The best way to share it would be a video of the gameplay once the map is finished.

Today is going to have to be a work day. I need to catch up on schoolwork, etc. Tomorrow I will post a legitimate idea. Today I am left thinking about doing a series of tutorials or the Source SDK and finishing the Crysis map (which makes me keep thinking about the game itself, which gets more and more epic every time I think about it). Maybe I should read more and start posting book reviews.

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